Chapter 40
‘She’s not trembling right now.’
Angela’s hands, which were scurrying away from the bottle and collecting the dirty carpet, remained silent, with no sign of trembling again.
‘What was it?’
Even if I was mistaken, I witnessed it too clearly.
‘Did she do it because she was nervous?”
Even if she was, I have no way to make her guilty here.
Then it’s my fault………? Why did I just ask her name…
‘No, even if she’s just working for many days, I can’t just call her for that.’
At least, I knew her name anyway. I soon soaked myself in the prepared bath, soothing myself. And I noticed at this time that, regardless of everything, Angela was a capable maid.
The water temperature was just right and sufficiently warm. It was good enough to say that it was perfect.
It was an excellent choice to choose a rose bath. Shall I ask her to tell me where the product came from later on?
“Ha.”
A languid breath flowed out.
I clapped my hands in the bathtub and put my head down.
The ceiling of the bathroom, hidden in the fog, caught my eye.
This made me feel relaxed and drowsy, but in the corner of my mind, I suddenly felt uncomfortable thorns, whether I could be like this.
Although it was meaningless at a time when I was already doing this.
By the time my body was relaxed, I left the bathtub. When I got out of the bath like that, a maid other than Angela was waiting for me.
“Viscount Bifren is looking for you.”
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The interior of the study decorated on one side of the living room was not a bit different from what I remembered. Even now, the interior was still antique and stylish to be changed in just three or four years.
“Would you like a drink?”
Lucas stuck out a transparent glass containing purple-coloured liquor. He put his head down and sat opposite.
“What about Ash?”
“How can I disturb him when he’s busy?”
Did he just call me then?
So did I look free? All right, that wasn’t wrong, so I ignored it.
No matter how complicated my mind is these days, it’s true that I don’t have a routine on the outside.
Although I didn’t think much about drinking, I decided to suit Lucas’s circumstances.
“It’s been a while since I’ve seen you. His Excellency’s face has become so thin than when I saw him before.”
“Yes.”
“Of course, you’ve become more beautiful.”
“Your whiskers are much shrivelier than before.”
“Haha, thank you. I’ve been working hard all day and night.”
To be honest, whenever I saw him working so hard, I wondered why, but I decided to swallow my unnecessary honesty.
Then Lucas looked sentimental as to remember the past. There were creases around the narrow eyes.
“Time flies.”
“……”
“It feels like yesterday when the former Duke and Duchess were like His Excellency and Princess.”
Then he looked back at me and gave me a blank look.
“I made a slip of the tongue.”
“It’s all right.”
It has been three years since my parents died. It’s past time to cry because of the mention of my parents. I said it was okay, but Lucas changed the subject as if he was uncomfortable.
“By the way my lady, you must be feeling reassured. His Excellency has become so imposing.”
“……yes.”
“You’re still on good terms these days, aren’t you? I can see that you are coming here together.”
Nodding my head without a word. Lucas put the glass he was holding down on the table.
“But when I see your special bond, I feel very proud of you both. By the way, Mrs Wedner would have been as happy to see it too.”
“Mrs Wedner?”
“She’s my maternal grandparents.”
Ah.
I’ve heard her name a few times, but it’s the first time I’ve heard she’s mentioned by her last name.
My Mother’s mother, I knew she was dead in an accident when I was very young. There is a piece of memory that my mother would sometimes take out a portrait of a middle-aged woman with a longing eye from the bedside.
“You must have been close to her.”
“No, but I do think of her when I see the princess.”
“Me?”
“You look a lot like the late Mrs Wedner.”
Come to think of it, I happen to resemble my mother’s family. It was a story I’ve heard before.
In particular, the hair colour is characteristically similar. My pure detection, often likened to a full-blown rose, was once said to be a colour that proved my maternal lineage.
Although it has faded a lot nowadays. My mother’s hair colour was close to orange.
Anyway, thanks to this, my origin has never been suspected, even though I don’t look much like my parents or Ash.
It was a strange thing. Well, they adopted me because I looked like her in the first place.
“Mrs.Wedner was as beautiful as you were in her youth.”
“I see.”
“It seems, You’ve got a lot of offers. What about the princess? Looks like a suitor will line up to the outside of the mansion.”
“No, no carriages couldn’t even go that way at one time.”
After that, Lucas and I talked a few more words. Although it was almost like he was talking to himself. I just kept Lucas in tune so that he wouldn’t feel lonely.
As a result, time slowly passed.
Since it was late, it was time to say let’s leave.
“……Ah.”
Lucas’s gaze stopped somewhere. I mysteriously followed his eye.
“To change the frame.”
There was a framed picture on the wall right next to the bookcase. Lucas clouded his words with an air of difficulty.
It was a family portrait.
I don’t remember exactly when it was painted, but it was quite a long time ago.
In the painting was a relatively young-looking mother and father, and a younger me, smiling brightly, holding the younger Ash’s hand.
I fixed my eyes on the frame. Lucas’s eye-catching look stuck in my profile.
But I wasn’t looking at my parents in the portrait, contrary to what he might be doing.
I was smiling broadly in the picture. Is it seven, or eight?
That’s when I found out that my parents would keep the secrets of my birth and that I wouldn’t be kicked out of the mansion.
And at the same time, the future like this is a time of total ignorance.
“……I’ll just go in. I’m tired.”
“Oh, princess.”
Lucas caught my body while I’m turning. When I looked at him in doubt, he handed me back the glass he had put out earlier.
“Since we talked, I thought you’d be thirsty. There’s almost no alcohol. It’s different from what it looks like.”
I looked at it and soon got it and drank it at once.
I wasn’t going to drink it, but I felt stuffy and thirsty. Maybe it was because of the portraits. As if to support the saying that there is little alcohol, the drink went over more smoothly than it looked.
“Then take a good rest.”
I turned away from Lucas, who greeted me.
The walk was heavy. I couldn’t tell whether it was just my feeling or my body was tired.
As I walked in the hallway, the portrait where I held Ash’s small hand firmly and smiled, revealed to my eyes every step of the way.
Maybe it’s because the bed has changed. I couldn’t fall asleep until I tossed around for a while.
*****
My eyes opened.
‘Morning…?’
No, it’s dark.
It was dark in the room, even though the curtains were opened.
I squint one’s eyelids. Soon it was lifted completely. Did I wake up at an ambiguous time? I felt thirsty because I woke up from sleep, so I stuttered around the table.
Then I was surprised.
“…….!”
I blinked my eyes.
“Mom, Dad?”
I saw people who were not supposed to be there.
On the bedside.
Maybe I woke up from sleep, but my voice was locked out. No, but it doesn’t make sense. I realized something the next moment when I saw two people sitting still staring at me.
‘I can see it so well and clear.’
It was pitch-dark everywhere. But it was so clear in the midst of such dark darkness.
‘Oh, it’s a dream.’
Think like that, my mother moved. A soft hand touched my cheek.
It was real.
‘It’s a vivid dream.’
I can’t believe it’s a dream.
Then there was a voice as sweet as her touch.
“Lydia. Our daughter.”
“……”
“We’re sorry.”
“Mom.”
I’ve had that echo in my mouth for the first time in a while. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen them in my dream. It’s been a long time since I dreamed of my parents.
‘Maybe it’s because I saw the portrait earlier.’
Even a cold daughter can’t help it. A year after my parents’ death, I stopped dreaming about them at night. I’ve had so many dreams before.
Is this the same dream as before? The moment I thought so, my father opened his mouth.
“I shouldn’t have adopted you.”
“……Daddy?”
“If I had known this was going to happen, then I would have told you not to.”
“Daddy.”
Why are you saying that all of a sudden?
The question came down to my neck, but I could soon see for myself how meaningless it was to spit it out.
This is my dream. I’m meeting two people created by my unconsciousness.
So, in the end, that’s what I was thinking.
I’d rather not be adopted, hah.
“……no.”
But I shook my head. In the end, I denied it even though I knew it was a conversation with me.
“No, I don’t.”
I got choked up. I bit my lips.
Reading the future seemed to bring the world down, but it wasn’t. Yeah, it wasn’t. No matter how I did, I never regretted entering this house.
I didn’t want to go back to what never happened.
I met my parents, I stayed with other people in the mansion, I got to know them, and……
“It’s not like that, really. The word of resentment I don’t even have in my heart. That’s all, so don’t say that.”
I felt like crying. The parents who hugged me were warmer as if they were true.
What a vivid dream.
Sadly.
How long would I have been hugged like that, suddenly, my parents disappeared. I just blinked blankly, hugging the air in the form of two people scattered like fog.
I know it’s a dream, and I know it’s all a fantasy, but it’s not easy to carry on with the sense of loss.
It was then.
“……Ash?”
A different face appeared on behalf of the missing parents. Somehow I was much more surprised than before.
I saw a family portrait, and then my parents appeared in my dream, so I thought Ash might appear next.
But even if he appeared, I thought I’d get childhood Ash, as I saw in the portrait.
As I saw yesterday, it’s not Ash who has become a multi-faceted adult.
“Noonim.”
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