Novel Bin Chapter 413: Closure
Chapter 413: Closure
Candace sat beside Jero\'s bed and placed a wet napkin on his forehead as she watched him sleep. No matter how much she thought about it, she still couldn\'t understand what she was doing by Jero\'s bedside or why she felt the need to do this, but she couldn\'t help it. Although he was a monster, she wasn\'t, and she couldn\'t bring herself to his level."Me? Who?" She asked as she rose from her seat.
"He is outside," the man said before stepping out of the room again, and Candace headed for the door.
Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Matt standing outside the door with a familiar looking duffle bag in hand and a styrofoam cup of coffee.
"Matt?" She asked, and he gave her a nod.
"Hello, Candace! I met Jade at the hotel and she told me you are here," he said as his eyes travelled over her body, from her short crop of black hair to the sandals she was wearing. She looked sort of exhausted, but she looked good.
"Yeah," she said as she awkwardly ran both hands over her sides and looked at both men guarding the door as she wondered if Jade told him what she was doing there.
"I\'m nursing Jero," she said, feeling slightly embarrassed by her admission. She couldn\'t help wondering what he was probably thinking concerning her nursing the same man she had described to be a monster.
"I see," Matt said as he took note of her embarrassed gaze.
"Do you mind stepping out with me for a moment? I would like to talk with you in private," Matt said, and Candace gave him a nod.
"Is that my bag?" She asked, staring at the familiar bag he was carrying, and Matt gave her a nod.
"Yeah. Since we weren\'t sure how long you\'d be here, Jade packed a couple of things you might be in need of," Matt explained as he extended the bag to her.
"Thanks," she said with a polite smile as she received the bag from him, and opened it for the men to inspect and see there was nothing harmful inside it.
"Give me a minute to drop the bag," she said as she returned inside the room and after dropping the bag she replaced the napkin on Jero\'s temple with a cool one before leaving the room.
"I got this for you," Matt said as he handed her the cup of coffee.
"Thanks," Candace murmured, and neither of them said another word to each other as they walked down the passageway in search of a convenient place they could talk.
While Candace wondered why he had come to see her and what he wanted to say, Matt was wondering the same thing. He had said he was going to stay away from her, so why had he canceled everything he had to do for the day and traveled down here to meet with her?
All through the flight down there he had tried to convince himself that he was only coming to do his best to talk her out of doing something she might regret by hurting Jero as Jade had told him she planned to do, so why was he still here even after Jade had informed him that Candace was watching over her dying husband and had changed her mind concerning harming him?
They both continued to walk until they had come out of the hospital building, since everywhere seemed busy with activity and there was barely a private spot where they could sit.
"I think there is a garden somewhere around here," Candace said when she sniffed flowers in the air, and Matt let her lead the way as they walked around the building until they got to the colorful garden where a couple of patients and their various caretakers sat.
Once they had found a spot for themselves, they sat down and Candace raised the cup of coffee to her lips as she waited for him to speak.
After some time passed and Matt still didn\'t say a word, Candace decided to speak first, "I\'m sorry."
"I heard that you left Jamal behind."
They both looked at each other when they spoke at the same time, and Candace smiled, "Yes, I didn\'t bring him with me. I didn\'t want him to see Jero," she explained and Matt nodded.
"I\'m sure he is happy over at Tom\'s. How long will you be here?" Matt asked, and Candace shrugged.
"I don\'t know yet," Candace said, since she was going to be there until Jero was dead and buried.
"I will probably stop by at Tom\'s place to see Jamal some time next week," Matt said as he turned his attention to some kids who were running around.
Candace smiled at the thought of how happy Jamal would be, "I\'m sure he will be very excited to see you."
"I hope so. Have you heard from your sister yet?" Matt asked, and she shook her head before telling him what Jero had said about a cargo ship.
"If they\'re traveling in a cargo ship that means it would likely take some time before you hear from her, depending on the destination of the ship," Matt said thoughtfully.
"Are you still very mad at me?" Candace blurted out as she looked at him.
She couldn\'t hold it in anymore. Matt had been sounding like nothing had happened between them and it was making her anxious. She wished he would express his annoyance or grievance instead of just acting like nothing had happened.
"That is not why I am here," he said quietly, trying not to let his bitterness show in his tone.
"Then why are you here?" Candace asked curiously, and Matt sighed.
"I don\'t know. Maybe I was just very worried about you and wanted to be sure everything was okay," he said with a shrug, but still did not look at her.
"I\'m sorry I had to lie to you that way," Candace said apologetically.
"How much of it was a lie?" Matt asked after a moment\'s hesitation.
"Only the part about Andy and I tampering with the drugs. We didn\'t," she confessed, and Matt gave her a nod.
"Then you shouldn\'t be sorry. You wanted me out of your life, and you succeeded. You should be glad your plan worked," Matt said with a shrug.
"I just didn\'t want you to get hurt," Candace said quietly, and this time he snorted as he shook his head and turned to meet her gaze.
"I don\'t believe that. On my way coming down here I kept thinking about it, and I came to the conclusion that Jero wasn\'t the reason you pushed me away. You knew about Jero and what he was capable of before signing up on that dating app. If you were that worried about Jero, you would never have signed up there. And I can swear that even if Jero dies this moment you still won\'t be ready. It\'s neither me nor Jero that you are worried about," Matt said, and Candace looked away from him.
"Tell me that I\'m wrong, and I will wait," Matt said as he continued to watch her, but she said nothing.
After some time, Matt sighed, "You don\'t have to worry. I didn\'t come here to ask you to be my girlfriend again or anything of the like. I think I\'m just here to find closure," Matt said dismissively, and Candace tried not to look too disappointed.
What was she expecting after continuously pushing him away in that manner? Truth was, she still wasn\'t sure if she was ready to be in a relationship yet. Mere thoughts of being in a relationship always made her stomach churn and twist into nervous knots.
Maybe he was right and she hadn\'t pushed him away just because she was scared of Jero, and she was probably always going to find excuses and reasons not to get involved with him even if she liked him and wanted to have him close to her.
Perhaps Jade was right, and she was a coward who was scared of being happy. Or maybe she was scared of tasting just a bit of happiness and nothing more.
All her life it seemed like happiness always eluded her. Things would seem great a bit at the beginning and then everything would go south. Although she had been too young to remember anything but if she was to go by what she had been told, then she had just been adopted by a wealthy family and had lost them to death. That was also the same way she had found love with Jero initially and not long after he turned into such a scary being that made life unbearable for her and Andy.
All these were probably mere excuses that didn\'t make sense, but she didn\'t want to take the risk. This fear was the same reason she had chosen not to search for the family who abandoned her. She didn\'t want to end up getting disappointed. If she didn\'t desire more than she already had, then she wouldn\'t be disappointed.
She was okay with having Jamal and Andy. And maybe she could have uncommitted lovers occasionally if she felt very lonely as time went on, but she didn\'t want any emotional commitment that would set her up for possible disappointment or heartbreak.
Matt was not only a younger guy, he was also a wealthy celebrity. What in the name of love could be possibly want to do with a single mother like her who was older than him? Being with him no matter how much she liked him would set her up for everything she was avoiding. Possible disappointment.
"I hope you find it," Candace said after a while, and Matt nodded.
"I hope so too. I learned that Jero is dying. How does that make you feel?" Matt asked, and Candace turned to him.
"Mostly relieved. A part of me feels sad and sorry, but I\'m relieved. Jamal is better off with a dead father than a living Jero," Candace said, and Matt merely stared at her.
"You must think I\'m crazy for being here with him despite everything, right?" She asked with a small smile and he shook his head.
"What I think shouldn\'t matter to you. I think I will be leaving now. I need to get back to Sogal in time for my next appointment," Matt said as he stood, and Candace did the same.
"Thanks for stopping by," she said with a polite smile.
"If you need a friend, you can count on me," he said as he held out his arms, and Candace smiled as she embraced him. She was thankful that he was still willing to offer his friendship despite everything.
"Thank you, Matt. For everything. Thank you," she said, and Matt sighed as he pulled away.
Perhaps avoiding her wasn\'t the best approach to getting over her. He had learned that the more he consciously tried to forget about her the more he missed her. So he was just going to be the friend she needed and slowly get over her with. That way he could focus on other things without missing her too much.
"Make sure you don\'t do anything you will regret. When all of this is over we will figure out the next step for you and Jamal, so don\'t worry yourself thinking about it too much," he said as he gazed at her, and Candace smiled at him, as her eyes filled up with tears.
Tom had promised to take care of her and Jamal, Jade had said she would help her, and now Matt was offering the same thing. Somehow she was now surrounded by people who cared about her.
Although she wasn\'t really expecting anything from them since she was well aware of how disappointing humans could turn out to be, still she was thankful for the thoughtfulness behind their words.