PATH OF THE STAR HUNTER

Those were the words spoken by Desmond, Cecilia had heard him clearly, and she could feel that Desmond was being sincere. Still, Cecilia could not imagine a worse scenario than the current one.

Cecilia might be naive, but she was not blind; the horrors around her were not lost on her. On the contrary, these events were etched firmly in Priestess’s memory.

Precisely because Cecilia witnessed the cruel bloodshed that came with war, she found it difficult to imagine anything worse. Cecilia had no way of knowing about the atrocities and carnage that occurred during the invasion of the mutated beasts and the subsequent year-long period in darkness.

She had no way of knowing, but that didn’t mean Cecilia was comfortable with it; no, she wanted to understand. Part of her couldn’t help but feel compassion for others and wanted to understand Desmond, his pain, his darkness.

To Cecilia, Desmond was the most complex and frustrating puzzle she had ever seen, the man showing so many shades of light and dark that she couldn’t determine his true nature, what drove him, and who he was.

Even now, as Desmond gazed out the window at the burning city, his blue eyes remained calm, like calm lakes undisturbed in the least by the war and death out there.

In fact, Cecilia had already noticed how little Desmond seemed to value human lives; just the way he looked at the corpses of the people he killed said enough. There was no empathy or regret, no pleasure or guilt; the only thing inside his pupils was a profound indifference as if it were a couple of pebbles in the road, a tiny annoyance not even worth considering.

The same thing happened a few minutes ago after their battle in front of the orphanage; Desmond looked around his surroundings, analyzing his situation. Still, it was as if the field of mangled corpses around him were not even there, as if they were just a part of the scene.

.....

From this, one could see that Desmond had no feeling at all when it came to the murder; he was like a cold, mindless killing machine.

But that was precisely what made no sense to her; Cecilia could not imagine that a killing machine could smile the same way Desmond did now while he held a child in his arms.

At some point, while Cecilia rested looking at Desmond, one of the girls from the orphanage approached Desmond looking for some kind of comfort or warmth. Everyone who had seen the Desmond; found themselves surprised when Desmond took the girl in his arms and cooed to her in a fatherly way with a warm smile on her lips.

Even Xolei, who didn’t usually take much interest in trifles, found the sight disconcerting to being unreal. It wasn’t just the smile on Desmond’s lips but also the care shown in treating the girl, the warmth, and his sincere kindness; Desmond seemed like a different person.

Only now that there was a little more time and peace, Cecilia was able to take a closer look at Desmond’s current appearance; she thus noticed all the dents and nicks in Desmond’s armor and the minor injuries all over his body.

In hindsight, Cecilia recalled that Desmond had suffered quite a bit of damage and injury during his previous battle and his subsequent fights on the way to the shelter.

However, Desmond never stopped fighting; the blue in his eyes always kept the same intensity. His actions never strayed from their course; he fought relentlessly, always looking out for her and others’ safety.

Some might have thought that Desmond was a knight faithful to his duty; Cecilia, on the other hand, knew that this was not the case. Others might have thought that this was the classic case of the knight protecting the beauty he fell in love with, but Cecilia also knew that this was not the case.

As ignorant as Cecilia was about love, she wasn’t naive enough to notice that Desmond didn’t like her. Not that it was strange either, they were both very different people.

This is where a paradox entered; it was precisely because they were different that neither of them could develop a genuine liking for the other, but the interest and, to a certain extent, esteem for these differences led both to want to understand the other.

Cecilia couldn’t contain her curiosity anymore, and while she watched as Desmond continued to lull the girl in his arms while he hummed a lullaby, she asked.

“How do you feel?”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? You have been fighting for a long time. You have spent a lot of mana and suffered many injuries.”

“This is nothing; I’ve been much worse.”

For some reason, Desmond’s nonchalant way about his injuries and efforts really irritated Cecilia, who was trying to be nice to him; she was fed up with Desmond’s half-hearted answers.

“why go so far to protect me? I really don’t get it. You and I can’t be considered friends. To be clear, I don’t even think I like you; you constantly think of me as an annoying naive girl, so why do you protect me?”

“It’s my job.”

“Would you even mind something like that?”

Desmond didn’t answer; whether he didn’t have an answer for Cecilia or just didn’t want to give her one, the conversation ended. But Cecilia wasn’t happy about it, she tried to understand it, and she wouldn’t give up so easily.

“You are very used to violence. Did your homeland go through some kind of tragedy?”

“Stop, Cecilia. I know what you’re trying to do, and I’m telling you right now that it’s useless. You and I will never be able to understand each other; we are fundamentally different. Our way of seeing and judging the world is different.”

“We can’t be that different, can we?”

The fervent and insistent Cecilia was something that Desmond was not in the mood to deal with. Still, there was also no feeling of rejection born in him that would justify being cruel to the girl, so he explained with all the patience that Desmond could muster.

“I’ll put it this way for you. You, Cecilia, are a kind and loving person who cares a lot about the well-being of others. You try to understand their problems, worries, and pain; even now, you are trying to understand who I am despite the atrocities you saw me commit.”

Sensing that Desmond had hit the nail on the head, Cecilia blushed a little, embarrassed that she was so easy to read, but Desmond ignored her expression and continued.

“You are someone who can bear many things on her own, but you cannot bear when others are victims of any abuse. You would rather shed your own blood than see others being hurt. That is the kind of person you are, but I am a completely different creature.”

Lost in Desmond’s words, Cecilia was slow to realize that he had left the girl in his arms on a chair so that she could rest peacefully. Desmond had been drawing closer to her with every word he spoke so that Desmond was now facing Cecilia at a barely significant distance.

“You are moved by your kindness and compassion, while I am moved by my selfishness and obsession. My heart doesn’t have room for a bunch of strangers. I only house those who are irreplaceable for me, those I love, to my family.”

Up until that point, Desmond’s tone had been warm, almost reminiscent, as if he was thinking of those special people as he spoke, but that changed from one moment to the next.

A chilling feeling soon invaded Cecilia as she looked at those blue eyes that looked back at her; they were cold as ice and sharp as steel; only the conviction deep within those pupils shone brightly.

“You will shed your blood to keep others safe, but I am different. To keep those precious to my heart safe, no sin is too great; I would build mountains of corpses and let rivers of blood flow if it would keep my loved ones safe.”

Desmond then took another step forward, coming to a point where he was extremely close to Cecilia, who barely tried to back away; she found herself stopped by the wall behind her.

Desmond didn’t even notice the cornered beast expression forming on Cecilia’s beautiful face. Moreover, Desmond didn’t even seem to notice Cecilia’s beauty at all; at this moment, there was nothing that could catch Desmond’s eyes.

It wasn’t just the words spoken by Desmond but also the conviction and feeling that accompanied these words; Cecilia felt as if she was about to be swallowed up by the darkness and malevolence that Desmond was letting out right now.

But Desmond’s behavior didn’t stop; he extended a hand, touching the right side of Cecilia’s face with it, almost affectionately... while speaking words of darkness and cruelty, with a clear threat, implied in them.

“Neither gods nor demons, nor kings or heroes, nor saints or sinners; none of them matter; their lives are worth nothing compared to those I carry in my heart.”